Black - In the Heart of Darkness there is Light

Illumination  -The Dark Magenta Vibration

Working my way through the colours of the rainbow, this is my story about my illuminating dance with black and Colour Mirrors Bottle G8, Illumination. There are a few moments of spookiness here, don’t be scared, it’s just my personal learning experiences, my lessons and the clearing of old fear patterns - all necessary, all needed and all perfect.

We all walk through a dark night of the soul from time to time, when we are ready to let go of old patterns and are ready to embark on a new path. Everyone’s experience is different and perfect for them. I have been ready to move forward for a long while now, but have been hesitant, afraid, held back by ancient fears. The Universe in all its wisdom knew that, knew that I was ready, and knew if I was going to do it, it really needed to kick my butt!

My G8 month of August

August started pretty well for me, just back from an amazing vacation with family where we travelled the length and breadth of the British Isles and experienced many magical moments, including some deeply transformative energies and past life recall on the sacred Isle of Iona, a small island in the Inner Hebrides on the Western coast of Scotland, and at the standing stones of Clava Cairns near Inverness. Expecting to be stunned and wowed by the sacred energies of the famous Iona Abbey, my sister and I had had quite an unexpected experience connecting instead deeply with the energies of the sisterhood in a ruined nunnery whilst intuiting the vaguely nefarious energies surrounding the banishment of the sacred feminine at the hands of the male clergy and powerful priests of old still clearly lingering in the Abbey. We both experienced some powerful moments of re-connection, of the reclaiming of lost parts of the sacred feminine and of a deep sense of the need for forgiveness of the male energies and integration and balancing on the male and female polarities within.

I started back to work on August 13^th relaxed, rejuvenated and ready to go.

But then came the dream or rather the nightmare! Was it real or not? It felt so real I dared not open my eyes in case I saw him standing in my bedroom and in those first few moments I could not discern waking reality from the perceived reality of the dream world. Hazy and terrified, I slowly came to full consciousness and the dream world dissolved in the morning light. I was still safely in my bed and unharmed, but I was shaken, and the feeling lingered on day after day. No more nightmares, just a constant feeling of a presence, of danger lurking close by.

Next came the most terrifying night of my life. I had been out for dinner and missed my train home, or rather had sprinted all the way to the station, checked the notice board to confirm my train at 22:28, careened down the stairs to platform 7 and arrived at exactly 22:25 with 3 minutes to spare. Unusually there was no

train waiting and even more unusually, the platform was deserted. This was notably odd, as trains here in Copenhagen run like clockwork and never ever leave early. It’s a Danish thing. Danes are very punctual and so are their trains. However when I glanced up at the departure screen on the platform, I noticed that it said 23:28 (not 22:28).  Darn! I must have misread the original departure board in the main hallway, an hour to wait. I assumed the 22:28 had been cancelled. (Yet, when I checked with the train company the next day they insisted that the 22:28 had left right on time. (think  parallel universes or a Harry Potter moment here!)

Looking back, this whole experience was already written in the stars. It was all as it was meant to be and I was fully protected always.

Anyway I took the 23:28 and arrived in my country town just in time to have missed the last bus. Nothing for it but to walk the 15 minutes home in the dark, so I did, but I was nervous as the dream still had me spooked. For some reason (thank you Universe) I stopped and fiddled with my phone until the flashlight function came on. Walking up the road it was dark and desolate, in a ridiculous effort to save electricity our municipal council ‘deciders’ have decided to turn out ALL street lights in residential areas after midnight during the summer months (but this is not Helsinki and we do not have the midnight sun here in Denmark. In August midnight is pitch dark!) So it was as black as ink barr the lights from a few houses here and there.

Then the nightmare began. A figure, it appeared to be male, dressed in black stepped out  in front of me , he appeared to materialize from behind a hedgerow, crossed to the other side of the road, and  stopped until I passed, waited a few moments then began to walk behind me.  I knew immediately, something was wrong with this scenario, but kept going, plunging ahead into the darkness, calling on my angels to protect me. The dark figure followed me quite a way up the road, I kept turning around, stopping to shine my phone flashlight (and possibly my saving grace) behind me to see where he was, and when I did this, he stopped too. I instinctively felt that I was in danger, but had no idea what to do. In the blind panic of the moment (can’t believe that even in this situation, I was too polite to call a friend and get her out of bed.. but of course I was not exactly thinking clearly in the heat of the moment) anyway I kept walking but knew I was coming to an area where the houses stopped and I would be plunged into absolute pitch blackness, so walking as fast as I could I  made my way down a side road onto the main road where at least there were street lights, taking myself way off course and further from home, but thinking he would not follow me there, he did! So now it was worse, the only way home was back into the absolute pitch dark. In a fit of terror, when I reached the end of the street lighted area, I simply abandoned shoes, plunged into the inky blackness and ran for my life. Shaking I miraculously managed to find my keys and insert them into the lock in the pitch darkness, get inside my house and bolt the door, call the police to report my ordeal and sleep fitfully with all the lights on. It was terrifying, I was shaken beyond belief, but I was safe. 

So when I got over the initial shock of my ordeal, and it took most of August, I started to ponder the concept of everything we experience being a product of our own perceptions and a manifestation of our inner fears and I started to try and figure out what the heck had just happened from an energetic and bigger picture perspective.

Slowly, understanding began to dawn on me and I realized that it was when I stopped trying to stick frantically to the street lit area (my illusion of safety) and actually surrendered and plunged into the heart of the darkness that I was first truly safe. Because at that point that it was so dark, it would have been impossible to know in which direction I had run and without shoes it was silent too. So in the black silence of the ‘Void’ I was actually very safe.

Hmmm, with so much symbolism there I was beginning to cheer up and realize that yet again, the Universe was sending me the perfect lesson in a way that would really catch my attention and would make me sit up and take notice. This tends to happen to me when the Unseens really want me to get the point of their teachings (gee thanks Universe, it worked! ;-/)

I had instinctively been using the Colour Mirrors Essence, White Dragon* for immediate help and Orange*  for shock (*see info.re. White Dragon & Orange at end of blog) since my ordeal, but decided to sit in front of my Colour Mirror bottles and ask for guidance to choose the perfect bottle for the lesson I was being given. I was (not surprisingly) immediately and undoubtedly drawn to bottle G8 - Illumination.  As I clutched it to me I felt immediate relief from the fear that was still stalking me. Yet I did not feel ready to bath in it, not yet.  It was comforting just to keep it under my pillow and hold it close to my solar plexus night after night.

The wording was, of course, perfect for what I was going through - I mean, you really could not make this stuff up!! ;)

G8. Illumination (Deep Magenta/Deep Magenta)

Colour Mirrors Bottle G8 - Illumination
 (Deep Magenta)

“This bottle is the darkest of the entire range. It is called Illumination as it is only by going into the darkness and embracing it that we have the potential to step into the light. By embracing the

shadow we release the judgment and the fear of the unspeakable that we all hold within our

shadows and only by facing that can we get beyond it to a place where creation of our reality can take place. We create our reality all the time. Everything we have in our lives exists because we created it, albeit unconsciously. G8 is there to help us go into that heart of darkness in our

subconscious and begin to feel the warmth and depth and support that exist there. It is the seat of all potential. It is that moment when sleep finally overtakes us. The void. The place of dreams.

This bottle helps us to clear our genetic lines and what we have inherited physically and karmically. The “sins” of the fathers can no longer be visited on the children once the past darkness has been illuminated. This is the bottle to use to clear issues with the physical body as it illuminates what we believe about our bodies and being physical. It is the ultimate support in helping us to create our reality. By focusing on what we desire to create and generate this bottle helps us clear unconscious blocks and bring clarity into what stops us from claiming our absolute magnificence”

I had received some very clear guidance to wait until the weekend before bathing in my G8 Bottle, which I did, as I am learning to listen to my inner guidance these days, and as expected, this guidance proved to be most wonderfully meaningful.

As it turned out, that weekend I was asked to attend a Celtic Wake. The celebration of the life of an old friend who had passed suddenly and I was going to meet up with a crowd old friends and acquaintances, many of whom I had not seen for close to 20 years. I was a real blast from the past and in many ways a chance to say farewell. I kept thinking about how Bottle G8 was informally known as the Full Stop in the Colour Mirror Series, and indeed this weekend felt like the end of an era, the end of one long journey. The sense of the full stop and completion was huge.

As I prepared to attend the Wake, I bathed in G8, let it pour over my body and seep into my cells. With my bathroom lit only by candlelight, the experience was rich and luxurious, the velvety black body oil invoked a feeling of nurturing and peace. As I dressed in a black dress and black leggings, ready for the Wake, I smiled as I realized I was wearing G8 both in oil on my body and the clothes I had chosen. And in continuing perfect synchronicity, this weekend was also the last days of the waning moon - Monday would bring the New Moon, and a new phase of the journey.

As I understand it, the activations my sister and I experienced on the Isle of Iona, stirred up old energies that were ready for release and forgiveness. In so many ways, both of our life paths include the theme of forgiveness of the masculine, the resurrection of the sacred feminine and the balancing of the masculine and feminine energies within. As within – so without.

Clava Cairns, Inverness, Scotland

I also felt clearly (and humbly) that I was somehow working not only with my own core wounding at this time, but with the ancient wounding of the Scottish people, because in the fashion that only the Universe can command, completely unbeknown to me at the time of my travels and within days of my return from my first Highland holiday since my childhood, I learned of a book and now also a TV series called Outlander, written by Diana Gabaldon, inspired by and set in the exact location that the pictures of my son and I were taken this summer -  The Culloden Battlefield and the ancient Clava Cairns at Inverness.

On hearing about this book, the energy began to pound through my body as I felt the urgency of the connection, so I quickly located a copy of Outlander and threw myself headlong into the turbulence of the Scottish Clan wars, re-experiencing as if in person, the hardship and danger of the times, when men lived and died by codes of loyalty, honour, allegiance and obedience, where rape, corporal punishment, witch trials, betrayal, murder and of course fighting the English armies were common place occurrences and it dawned on me that what I had experienced during my ‘dark night’ was my own personal, yet also the collective 'Scottish core wounding’ surfacing in search of  healing.

The timing was impeccable too, because it was becoming clear to me that as the coming referendum on Scottish Independence draws near, the many deep reaching and often emotional debates are serving perfectly to stir the pot of ancient energies, reopen festering wounds and encourage buried patterns of collective fear and victim consciousness up to the surface, in order to finally to heal and to be let go of.  Like absolutely everything, it's all about energy and about our individual and collective perceptions, the understanding and releasing of our ancient wounding and our evolutionary journey to perfect wholeness. 

Not really about England and Scotland, not about economics, politics or the weapon industry. Not about North Sea oil, Margaret Thatcher or the bedroom tax, not really, for these, like my assailant, are ‘just’ the shape we give our ancient core wounds, the wounds we have carried deeply in our cellular memory for aeons and aeons and they offer us the opportunity, the perfect mirror, to recognize and to let go of, the deep seated belief patterns that literally breathe life into them. 

Tonight, Monday evening, as I write this blog, I have just intuitively chosen Bottle 19 from my array of Colour Mirrror Bottles, asking again for forward guidance and integration of the lessons learned.  Bottle 19 is Pale Magenta over Pale Gold, It is called  Buddhic Bliss, and I am deeply grateful for, and encouraged by, the words describing this bottle:

“Resurrection and new beginnings. This is a most positive colour combination as the magenta denotes Divine love lit up and shining upon you and the pale gold underneath denotes a deep sense of your own power and beauty. You have come through the dark night of the soul and now it is time to own heaven’s blessings of joy and love. You are the power in your life and everyone would agree with you at this point. Enjoy this time of peace and plenty”

……. and so begins a new phase of my journey…

Much love x

Additional Colour Mirrors Products mentioned in the blog:
www.colourmirrors.com

* White Dragon Essence:  This dragon is complementary to the Black Dragon. She holds the same energy of bringing light into darkness and a reminder that night and day have equal value. She relates to the light of the moon and will reflect to you who you really are. She is gentle and wise and brings clarity and lightness into heavy situations and supports the process of grieving. This essence is most helpful when it feels as if the road ahead is too dark to carry on. She brings relief when there seems to be no reason to go on. She is the light at the end of the tunnel. She is the rainbow of hope after difficulties. Love yourself enough to let her in and she will carry you. White Dragon gives us the opportunity to stop judging what we see in the 
mirror.

* Bottle C2. Sacral Chakra (Gold / Orange) 

Beneficial for shock and trauma, loss of power and feeling abused. Good for candidiasis, problems with assimilation of nutrients and eating disorders, hormonal imbalance, menopause, nervous conditions, irritable bowel syndrome, skin problems, sexuality. Good for clearing childhood issues of abuse and control. Clears away fear, confusion and emotional bewilderment. Very calming after a shock.